


it's nice to have a friend

by warmswinter



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-10
Updated: 2020-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:00:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23079742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/warmswinter/pseuds/warmswinter
Summary: Junmyeon comes back home to Seoul, hoping that Sehun is still waiting for him. Things don't go quite as he expected.
Relationships: Kim Junmyeon | Suho/Oh Sehun
Comments: 13
Kudos: 125
Collections: Âme sœur: SeHo Fic Fest Round 1





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> prompt #39

Junmyeon was shoving the last bit of trinkets into his suitcase when he heard a soft knock on his bedroom door.

“Come in!” he responded without looking up, trying desperately to zip the overly-stuffed suitcase up without actually breaking it.

“Do you need help with that?”

Junmyeon looked up to see his best-friend-slash-next-door-neighbor leaning on his doorway with a grin on his face. He conceded with a sigh. “Yes, please.”

Sehun laughed as he made his way into the room, closing the door with a kick before sitting down cross-legged on top the suitcase. “You know you can buy new things over there, right? It’s not like they don’t sell pens in New York.”

“I’m just trying to save some money, Hunnie,” Junmyeon replied, dragging the zipper with all of his body weight. “I have to work part-time there to cover my expenses and all.”

“Sounds tedious,” Sehun retorted back. “Maybe you should consider staying here, instead.”

Junmyeon finally managed to click the zipper into the lock with a triumphant  _ yes! _ before he looked up at his best friend, whose usual cocky demeanor was dimmed by a sad smile.

“You know why I can’t, Sehunnie,” he replied, suddenly feeling wistful. “I have to go and just...see if I can make it or not. You understand, right?”

“I do,” Sehun replied quietly, before standing up and hopping onto Junmyeon’s unmade bed. “I just wish you could’ve done that here.”

“You and me both,” Junmyeon sighed, plopping down next to him. “Are you staying?”

“Of course. My mom also said that I could skip school tomorrow to send you off,” Sehun said. “Are you excited?”

“I mean—yeah,” Junmyeon replied. “I’m scared, though.”

Junmyeon felt Sehun shuffling next to him, and the next thing he knew, he was covered by his blanket and half of his best friend’s body weight. He chuckled as he opened his arm so that Sehun could use it as a pillow, which the latter did, almost like a reflex—a habit that had been built since they were toddlers.

“I’m really gonna miss you, hyung,” Sehun whispered, his voice scratchy all of a sudden. “How willI survive college without you?”

“We can always Skype, and you can e-mail me whenever you like,” Junmyeon replied, stroking Sehun’s hair comfortingly. “Besides, I can go home every now and then—we’ll catch up then.”

“It’s not the same, though,” Sehun said quietly. “I’m gonna miss our Sunday movie marathons.”

“Me too.” Junmyeon’s heart suddenly felt heavy as his best friend’s hold on him tightened. “I’m gonna miss you, Angel.”

Sehun groaned, burying his face on Junmyeon’s chest. “Shut up, old man.”

They were quiet after that, Junmyeon slowly lulled to sleep by the sound of Sehun’s steady breaths. He closed his eyes, his consciousness slowly fading, and he heard a whisper.

“I love you, hyung.”

☽

Junmyeon stares at the polaroid picture on his desk before looking around at his bedroom. He spent the last six years in this place, sharing a room with Yixing and Baekhyun in the two-bedroom apartment that they call home. They were pretty sure that this place had been an active crime scene when they sublet it off of Craigslist and that was the only reason they could afford a two-bedroom apartment in New York—but they make it work.

“ _ Junmyeon hyuuung _ ,” Baekhyun whines loudly, not even bothering to knock as he storms into Junmyeon’s room and plops into his bed. “Yixing’s being mean again.”

“If being mean means refusing to fuck you five seconds after he got home after a dress rehearsal, then I don’t have any problem with it.”

“Meanie.” Baekhyun pouts. “We haven’t done it in  _ two weeks _ , I’m getting blue balls here.”

“Ew, TMI, Hyunee.” Junmyeon wrinkles his nose. “You’re not going to die from abstinence—and to be honest, I have been sleeping very well these past couple weeks without your loud screaming at two in the morning.”

“Bitter old man,” Baekhyun spat. “You’re just jealous because you haven’t been getting laid ever since Kris moved back to Vancouver.”

“Lies,” Junmyeon hisses. “I slept with that guy from the bar last month when you and Xing ditched me to fuck in the bathroom. Gross, by the way.”

Baekhyun rolls his eyes. “Prude. You said that as if you’ve never done it.”

“Proud to say that I haven’t,” Junmyeon replies airily. “Pretty sure the walls in there would give you STDs.”

Baekhyun snorts out a laugh before looking at him thoughtfully. “Do you miss him? Kris, I mean.”

“It’s not like we were anything serious anyway.” Junmyeon shrugs uncomfortably. Baekhyun has always been eerily perceptive when he talks about these things.

“Not for a lack of trying on his part, though,” Baekhyun replied drily. “You’ve been keeping him at arm’s length ever since you went home from that Chuseok trip last year.”

Junmyeon could feel the heat starting to creep up his neck. “I don’t know what you talking about,” he mumbles as he turns around to double check his desk drawers.

“Oh really? So you’re not still pining over that childhood friend of yours? What’s his name—Seojong?”

“Sehun,” Junmyeon automatically corrects before he could even think about it, and he doesn’t need to turn around to know that Baekhyun is smiling that shit-eating grin of his.

“See,” Baekhyun shrieks triumphantly. “You are pining—“

“I am not!”

“Just admit it, hyung—“

“Oh for the love of god, would you two  _ please _ shut the fuck up!”

Yixing’s groan startles them both. The man appeared on the doorway, a deep frown etched on his face. “I’m so fucking tired, can’t you guys keep it down?”

“Sorry, babe,” Baekhyun coos. “C’mere.” He pats the spot next to him on Junmyeon’s bed, and Junmyeon could only watch in horror as Yixing drags his sleepy figure to lie down on the bed.

“Please tell me you’ve showered,” Junmyeon begs.

“You haven’t changed the sheets in two weeks, shut up,” Yixing mumbles sleepily in his accented Korean.

Baekhyun laughs quietly, moving around so he could comfortably play with Yixing’s hair to help the latter fall asleep. The movement tugs on Junmyeon’s heart a bit. With his past relationships, even with Kris, he had never gotten into that place where those little quirks and habits are as natural as breathing. His past relationships never seemed to be effortless, or easy.

Junmyeon had a type after all: men who barely give him the time of day, who he had always had to chase after without receiving anything in return. He thinks he has bad taste in men—Baekhyun is more upfront when he said that Junmyeon is a masochist. Yixing was kinder and simply said that he needed to learn to love and value himself more.

“So you’re really going back, huh?” Baekhyun says, snapping Junmyeon out of his reverie. “To teach, no less.”

“I think it’s for the best, don’t you?” Junmyeon chuckles wearily. “There’s not a lot of options for me here.”

“You’re a great actor, hyung. And you’re a fantastic singer!” Baekhyun exclaims, his loud voice drawing complaints from Yixing. “Sorry babe.” Baekhyun apologizes, patting Yixing’s hair gently.

“But, hyung, honestly,” Baekhyn continues, his volume lower this time, careful not to stir his sleeping boyfriend. “That role you played on that musical was so good and your reviews are pretty good, too. Why are you going back to Seoul?”

“Because ‘pretty good’ doesn’t cut it, Baek,” Junmyeon sighs. “The biggest role I got was the second lead on an off-Broadway musical that ran for three weeks before it went bankrupt. It’s time for me to move on.”

“You could always go to more auditions—“

“They don’t really hire Asian leads, Hyunee.” Junmyeon shrugs. “And honestly even if there was an open call or if there is a role written for an Asian lead, there’s always going to be someone better.”

“But your parents—“

“They’re not bad people,” Junmyeon says quietly, his voice weary. “They’re just—a bit controlling. And they were civil with me when I went home for Chuseok last year.”

“Besides,” Junmyeon continues. “The job comes with an apartment near the campus and nowhere near my parents’ house. I don’t have to see them if I don’t want to. I’ll be okay, Hyunee.”

“You’ll always have a home here, though,” Baekhyun says. “If everything gets too much. We’re your family too, you know.”

“I know,” Junmyeon replies, his heart clenches at his best friend’s words. “Thanks, Hyunee, really.”

☽

Junmyeon looks out the window as the plane begins its descent into Incheon, a mixture of emotions brewing in his chest as he faces the reality of coming home. Seoul had felt too small for him—too suffocating. Seoul was his parents’ pressure and his brother’s indifference. But Seoul was also Sehun. Seoul was sneaking into their building rooftop and drinking cheap beer with his childhood best friend. Seoul was late night stroll at the bank of the Han River, dreaming about moving to America and becoming a singer. Seoul was falling asleep in Sehun’s bedroom floor, because it feels more like home than his actual house.

Junmyeon is not too keen with the prospects of meeting his parents again, but seeing Sehun might make it bearable.

The plane landed smoothly and Junmyeon takes out his carry-on from the cabin, nodding politely at the stewardesses before heading out to the terminal. He disables the airplane mode on his phone and is immediately met with an onslaught of texts from his friends.

**from: baekhyun**

_ have you landed yet hyung????? CALL ME IMMEDIATELY _

**from: yixing**

_ junmyeonnie, we miss you already :(( hope you have a safe flight!! call us when you land in seoul! _

**from: sehunnie :)**

_ hyung, i'm on my way to the airport with chanyeol and kyungsoo. call us when you land ok i'm so excited to see you omgomgomg!!!!!!!!! _

**from: sehunnie :)**

_ i've missed you _

And—okay. Maybe Junmyeon’s heartbeat picks up its pace when he read that. He smiles to himself as he types a response. 

**to: sehunnie :)**

i've just landed :)

**to: sehunnie :)**

i've missed you too.

Thankfully he doesn’t have to wait long for his luggage, and he mentally makes a note to thank Yixing for all those Thursday afternoons he dragged Junmyeon to the gym, because Junmyeon has to lug two giant suitcases to his trolley that houses most of his wardrobe. It truly baffles him how many clothes he has despite living in a cramped two bedroom apartment in New York.

He pushes his trolley towards the gate, heart rate increasing with every step he takes. He’s going to see Sehun again (and Chanyeol and Kyungsoo too, his brain helpfully supplies). He could see him regularly now. No need to rely on fuzzy FaceTime connections and figure out complicated time zones. He could touch Sehun again and—

_ There he is. _

Sehun looks so handsome in a navy blue turtleneck and a black denim jacket, wearing skinny jeans that Junmyeon would bet accentuate his magnificent ass beautifully. He’s holding up a big sign that reads WELCOME HOME JUNMYEON HYUNG that has a lot of hand-drawn hearts and blown up pictures of his face during his awkward puberty phase, smiling widely at him.

(He almost missed Chanyeol jumping up and down next to him and Kyungsoo looking exasperatedly at his hyper husband).

The three of them rush to Junmyeon and Chanyeol immediately swoops him into a tight hug. “Hyung!” he yells excitedly, right to Junmyeon’s ear. “I’ve missed you so much!”

Junmyeon laughs, his eyes getting teary. “I’ve missed you too, Chanyeollie.”

Kyungsoo hugs him next, patting his back twice. “It’s good to have you back, hyung.”

“Thank you, Soo.” Junmyeon replies. Then, he turns his attention to his best friend, who’s been staring at the exchange, looking at him fondly. Junmyeon raises his eyebrow at him, and Sehun rolls his eyes before pulling him into a tight hug. He’s grown so tall since he graduated high school that Junmyeon could comfortably rest his head on Sehun’s surprisingly broad chest.

“Hi, hyung.”

“Hi, Sehunnie.”

“Still as small as I remember, I see.”

“And you’re cockier than I remember, Angel.”

Junmyeon hears Chanyeol’s snickering and Kyungsoo’s snort, reminding him that they are, in fact, in a public place. He pulls away from Sehun’s embrace, hoping that his face is not as red as he feels. Thankfully, Sehun seems to feel as reluctant as himself to part, wrapping an arm around Junmyeon’s shoulders.

“Come on, let’s go get breakfast.”

☽

The drive to Kyungsoo and Chanyeol’s flat is filled with stories, catching everyone up on what they’ve been doing. Kyungsoo and Chanyeol had recently opened their own café, and business has been booming thanks to Kyungsoo’s food and Chanyeol’s music. Their flat is located just on top of the café.

“Open mics are on every Friday,” Chanyeol says, grinning at Junmyeon from the rearview mirror with his hands on the wheel. “I’ve already signed you up for next week.”

“I did not agree to that!” Junmyeon whines. Sehun laughs at him and gently pats his arm. “Come on, hyung, it’s been a while since I’ve heard you sing.”

“I’m not promising you anything,” Junmyeon mumbles. He can feel Kyungsoo and Chanyeol’s amused stares through the rearview mirror, and he pointedly looks out the window, staring at the sea.

They make small talk afterwards, Kyungsoo informing Junmyeon about Tao’s upcoming wedding, and Junmyeon telling stories about his escapades in New York that mostly started with too much alcohol and Baekhyun’s sweet talking him and Yixing into doing whatever terrible ideas he came up with.

Before long, they arrive at Chanyeol and Kyungsoo’s café. It’s a quaint two-story building, the interiors are simple with a rustic vibe, making the place feels homey. Kyungsoo tiptoes to give Chanyeol a kiss before slipping into the kitchen to cook them breakfast. Junmyeon sees how Chanyeol’s cheeks redden in the slightest as he smiles to himself.

“You guys are gross,” Sehun comments nonchalantly as he takes the seat near the window, leaning against it. “Hyung, I swear to god their libidos are even higher after they got married—it’s so annoying.”

“You’re just saying that because you’re jealous, Sehunnie,” Chanyeol retorts back, while Junmyeon simply laughs and takes a seat across from Sehun.

“Of you two? No, thank you.” Sehun huffs, fishing his phone out of his pocket.

“What about you, hyung? Are you still seeing that Kris guy?” Chanyeol asks suddenly, catching Junmyeon off-guard. There’s a glint in his eyes that makes Junmyeon nervous.

“Uh, no,” Junmyeon replies. “He moved back to Canada—and we weren’t serious anyway.”

“Huh,” Chanyeol says exaggeratedly. “Isn’t that  _ interesting _ , Sehunnie.”

“Yeah, sure,” Sehun says, unfocused, typing away at his phone with a smile on his face. Junmyeon pouts at that. It’s only been a couple of hours since they got to see each other again and Sehun is already ignoring him.

“Yah, pay attention, dumbass.” Chanyeol scolds. “Who are you texting, anyway?”

“None of your business,” Sehun replies in a sing-songy voice.

“Wait—are you—”

“Chanyeol, can you give me a hand?” Kyungsoo calls.

“Yeah, sure thing, babe,” Chanyeol responds, frowning at Sehun’s direction as he walks off to where his husband is cooking.

“Look at him,” Sehun laments, putting his phone down on the table and sighs, resting his head on his arms. “So whipped.”

“I don’t know, I think they’re kind of cute.” Junmyeon shrugs. “I would call myself lucky if I have what they have.”

“Do you, now?” He outstretches his hand, reaching for Junmyeon’s and tangled their fingers together. “They’re already talking about adoption, you know.”

Junmyeon knows that this is a big piece of information that Sehun just dropped regarding their two best friends, but he could not concentrate because— _ shit, is Sehun holding his hand?  _ He could only manage an  _ Oh? _ in response, but luckily, Sehun is still staring at the happy couple cooking together in the open kitchen.

Kyungsoo is feeding something to Chanyeol, blowing it gently before he puts it in Chanyeol’s mouth. Chanyeol’s eyes widen, before he exclaims loudly, “This is  _ so  _ good!” Kyungsoo looks up at him, smiling proudly. Chanyeol then wraps his arms around Kyungsoo’s waist from behind, and to Junmyeon’s surprise, Kyungsoo doesn’t even try to wiggle out of his hold—leaning into it, even.

“They’re gross,” Sehun comments under his breath, turning his attention to his and Junmyeon’s joint hand instead, playing with Junmyeon’s fingers.

“Careful, Hunnie. You might turn into them once you’ve found the right person,” Junmyeon teases.

Sehun snorts. “Yeah, no I won’t.”

“Oh?” Junmyeon raises his eyebrows. “How can you be so sure?”

“Because I’ve already found him,” Sehun replies, eyes fixed on Junmyeon’s fingers.

“Really?” Junmyeon’s heart is beating a million miles per minute. Is Sehun going to  _ confess _ ? It couldn’t be—could it?

“Yeah,” Sehun replies shyly, still not meeting Junmyeon’s eyes. He’s quiet for a moment, before he takes a deep breath, seemingly steeling himself.

“Hyung, we’ve known each other for a long time now, right?” Sehun says. Junmyeon only nods in response, not trusting himself to speak. “Well, I, uh, I think that you’re one of the most important people in my life, hyung, and I—I have something that I need to tell you.”

“Yes, Sehunnie?” Junmyeon says breathlessly.  _ God, is this really happening? _

Sehun takes a deep breath, and Junmyeon notices his ears reddening. He looks up, his eyes finally meeting Junmyeon’s.

“I’m getting married,” Sehun announces, smiling brightly. “And I want you to be my best man.”

☽

“Wait, fuck, so let me get this straight,” Baekhyun says through the speaker of Junmyeon’s phone as he unpacks his suitcase in his new apartment. “You’re telling me that Sehun is engaged— _ to be married. _ ”

“Yes, Baekhyunee, that’s what I’ve been telling you,” Junmyeon sighs as he places his shirt into the drawer. The university gave him a one bedroom apartment and it’s about the same size as their apartment back in New York, so it feels quite spacious—if not too big for Junmyeon to live there alone.

“Shit, that sucks, hyung, I’m so sorry.” He can hear Baekhyun’s sigh on the other side of the world.

“The dumbest thing was that I thought he was going to confess his feelings for me.” Junmyeon couldn’t help the bitter laugh that escapes from his throat. He plops down onto the bed, the exhaustion finally catching up to him. “I’m so stupid.”

“Junmyeon—“

“It’s alright,” Junmyeon cuts him off. He hates being pitied. “It was just a stupid crush, anyway. I’ll get over it.”

“If you say so,” Baekhyun replies. Junmyeon could hear him sigh in exasperation.

“He also asked me to be his best man,” Junmyeon adds after a moment. He hears his best friend curse again on the other end of the phone. “It’s tragic, I know.”

“Please tell me you have at least some sense to turn it down or at the very least think it over and not say yes immediately,” Baekhyun pleads, making Junmyeon chuckle.

“You know me too well, Baekhyun-ah.”

“I hate you.” Junmyeon could practically hear his pout. “I hate you so much for being an idiot and for not waiting for Yixing to wake up.”

“You and I both know that it’s impossible to wake him up on his day off,” Junmyeon retorts back. “And yeah, I kinda hate myself too for being this dumb.”

In reality, it’s impossible to say no to Sehun. One, because there is no logical excuse he could possibly give out that does not involve him confessing his feelings for his best friend. Two, because Junmyeon is out of practice denying him of anything, seeing as they only see each other for a week or two every year for six years. And three, because Sehun’s face lights up when Junmyeon agreed to be his best man, and all Junmyeon ever wanted to do is to make his best friend happy.

“So, what now?” Baekhyun asks. That’s a very good question. Junmyeon sighs for what he feels like the hundreth time that day. “I don’t know, Baek. I’ve been here less than 24 hours and I already have to deal with this pile of shit.”

“I mean, at least you don’t have to see your parents yet,” Baekhyun supplies. “That should count for something—though I don’t understand how they could accept you being gay and not the fact that you want to be a musical actor.”

Junmyeon chuckles. “Well, for starters, one of those is a choice and the other is not. I think it was something along the lines of ‘you can have a stable job and be gay, pick your struggle.’”

“Well, aren’t they progressive,” Baekhyun comments sarcastically, probably rolling his eyes for effect. “Do you think they’re still adamant on you becoming a lawyer?”

“Nah,” Junmyeon responds. “They’re not thrilled about me being a drama teacher, but at least they don’t think that this is a downgrade—or at least my mom doesn’t. I haven’t really talked to my dad yet.”

They were quiet for a moment, and Junmyeon could feel his eyelids drooping down from exhaustion before Baekhyun asks, “Who’s the lucky guy?”

Junmyeon sighs. “Kim Jongin, I think?”

“Kim Jong— _ KAI _ ?” Baekhyun shrieks. “The dancer-slash-supermodel?”

“I think so?” Junmyeon shrugs. Chanyeol had the same reaction earlier at the restaurant. “Is he that famous?”

“Is he _ —oh my god _ , you old fart, how have you not heard of him? He’s the face of fucking  _ Gucci _ ! He’s so handsome and so talented and—“

“— _ marrying my best friend in about eight months _ , yeah I get that, Baekhyun.”

“Sorry, I was just carried away. It’s just—Yixing worked with him too earlier this year and he said Kai was so handsome and polite and—“

“—again,  _ marrying my best friend _ , whom I have a massive crush on, in more or less eight months.”

“Look, Baek, it’s been a long day, I’m gonna go take a hot bath.”  _ And probably drown myself in it _ , Junmyeon adds in his head.

“Alright. Rest well, hyung,” Baekhyun replies gently. “I’ll see if Xing and I can spend some money to go back to Korea this year.”   
  
“You don’t have to—“

“I want to,” Baekhyun says firmly. “Besides, Yixing has been wanting to visit Bucheon and meet my grandmother, anyway.”

Junmyeon’s heart clenches. He really, really misses his two best friends.

☽

Three weeks pass by in a blur as Junmyeon settles into his new routine as a professor and refamiliarizing himself with the city of Seoul. The city has changed a lot in the last six years, but he’s glad that some things stays the same: the boba stand near Hongdae station that he and Sehun used to frequent back in middle school, the convenience store in Apgujeong on the corner of their parents’ apartment, and the family-run Chinese restaurant right across their building.

Sehun texted him last night, asking to meet up at Kyungsoo’s café around 8 am—on a  _ Sunday _ —before it opens, for what he called a “best man duty”. To be honest, Junmyeon had spent the last couple of weeks sort of in denial and stalking Sehun’s social media profile—something that he foolishly didn’t do once he started catching feelings for his childhood best friend. If he had some working brain cells and did that from the start, he would’ve known that Sehun is in fact dating one Kim Jongin, a famous dancer that just  _ happens _ to be a goddamn supermodel. Junmyeon might’ve spent one drunken night hate-watching videos of Kim Jongin’s  _ Vogue  _ photoshoots out of pure spite.

Of course he’s gorgeous. Tall, tanned, and lithe, yet built like a marble statue of a Greek god. He’s the exact opposite of Junmyeon. He saw a picture of him and Sehun together and they fit so fucking well together that it sickens him. 

He hasn’t seen Sehun since that day. Sehun texts him sometimes, asking him how he’s doing and whether or not he has been eating, and whining about his tired muscles after practice and promising that he will drag Junmyeon out for drinks one of these days. Junmyeon feels like he wants to crawl into a hole and die when he remembers what happened the last time they went drinking together last Chuseok.

“Hyung!”

Junmyeons almost jumps out of the chair when he hears Sehun screaming right into his ears. He hears Sehun’s obnoxious snickering while he’s trying to lower his heart rate and calms himself down. Once he did, he reaches out and harshly tugs on Sehun’s ear. “ _ You little shit— _ “

“No! Jongin, help me!” Sehun cries out, and Junmyeon’s eyes widen in surprise. Lo and behold, standing next to them is  _ the _ Kim Jongin, smiling in amusement. He’s wearing a simple outfit of long-sleeved shirt and jeans, but on him it looks so fancy and expensive that Junmyeon is willing to bet that it’s more expensive than his last two apartments combined.

Junmyeon releases his hold on Sehun out of surprise, and Sehun uses that moment to escape and hides behind Jongin’s tall frame. “He’s being mean to your fiancé, punish him.”

It makes Junmyeon’s insides feel weird—Sehun used to do the exact same thing with him while they were growing up (and, let’s be honest, when Sehun was small enough to hide himself beside Junmyeon). Junmyeon pushes it all down and puts on a smile. “You must be Kim Jongin.”

“Ah, yes. Nice to meet you, Junmyeon-ssi,” Jongin bows politely before shaking his hand. “I’ve heard so much about you.”

“Sehun talks a lot of shit, I bet most of it is not true,” Junmyeon jokes. “And you can call me hyung, Jongin-ah.” 

Sehun pouts. “Why are you fraternizing with the enemy?”

“Because you’re being dramatic, sweetie, and I want to make a good first impression,” Jongin replies nonchalantly. Junmyeon is surprised that Sehun didn’t cringe and hit Jongin when he called him sweetie. Junmyeon did it jokingly once and Sehun pinched his arm so hard that he had the bruise for a month.

“You two suck,” Sehun groans. “I knew you two are going to get along and plot against me.”

“Yeah, well, that’s on you,” Junmyeon retorts back. “Jongin and I are going to be best friends and we’re going to go to Everland without you.”

Jongin laughs at that, reaching out to high-five him which Junmyeon gladly receives.

“I hate you both.” Sehun pouts. “Well, enjoy today then. I’m out.”

“Huh?” Junmyeon watches his best friend turn around, heading towards the door, and then exit the building, dumbfounded. “What’s happening now?”

“Sehun had to cover a class for the trainees today,” Jongin explains as Sehun walks out the door. “The teacher’s wife went into labor unexpectedly this morning, and you know how he is.”

“Selfless to the core,” Junmyeon replies. “I know.”

They stand awkwardly for a while before Kyungsoo suddenly emerges from the back door, looking pissed, surprising them both. “Where’s that little shit? Why did he text me good luck with a barrage of monkey emojis?”

“Because he’s weird,” Junmyeon snorts. He looks at Jongin skeptically then. “Are you sure you want to spend the rest of your life with that weirdo?”

“I’m sure,” Jongin replies with a dopey grin on his face. That funny feeling on Junmyeon’s insides comes back with a vengeance. For a moment he forgot that  _ this  _ is the man that Sehun is going to marry.

☽

Best man duty, it turns out, is food tasting. Jongin explains that they were planning an intimate wedding, only inviting their closest families and friends to a beautiful private villa in Hawaii, officiated by Jongin’s best friend’s husband whom the villa also belonged to. They’ve asked—more accurately, Sehun had  _ begged _ —Kyungsoo to cater the wedding. Kyungsoo had never done catering before, so he’s both excited and on edge because it is a wedding, one of his best friend’s wedding no less, and he does  _ not _ want to fuck this up.

“Soo, did you stay up all night?” Junmyeon says in astonishment, looking at the abundance plates of food in front of him. Kyungsoo had designed some menus, a lot of menus, in fact. From traditional Korean, to fusions, western food—you name it, it’s probably in there somewhere.

Kyungsoo yawns. “Yeah. I think we’re going to close today. Or maybe only open for dinner. Both Chanyeol and I are too exhausted to deal with customers today.”   
“Ah, I’m very sorry about that Chef Do,” Jongin apologizes deeply, but Kyungsoo simply waves it off. “It’s fine, it’s not your fault. I got overexcited.”

Kyungsoo hands them each a plate and a set of cutlery. “Make sure to taste everything, I’m going to nap on the corner booth. Write down your questions and I’ll answer them when I wake up, okay?”

They both nod, and Junmyeon pats Kyungsoo’s shoulder in sympathy when he walks past them. Junmyeon and Jongin exchange a look before they start tasting the elaborate menus that Kyungsoo made for the wedding. They eat relatively silently, feeling a bit awkward as they just met that day, and Junmyeon had an impression that Jongin was a bit on the shyer side. 

Junmyeon is starting to find the silence unbearable, so he clears his throat before he says, “So Jongin, how did you and Sehun meet?”

Jongin looks at him and smiles shyly, and yes, Junmyeon has to concede that he is  _ kind of _ cute. “Sehunnie hasn’t told you?”

Junmyeon shakes his head in response, his heart tugging annoyingly at the familiar nickname. “No. Sehun and I didn’t really talk that much when I was still in New York—time differences and all.”

“I see.” Jongin nods. “Well, Sehun and I met at the company. I was practicing for an ad I was doing, and I kept running into him in the corridors. So I asked around for his number and I asked him out. It took a while until he agreed to meet up with me, but I’m glad that he did.”

Junmyeon hums, suddenly losing his appetite. “How long have you guys been seeing each other?”

“A little over a year,” Jongin says with a smile. He laughs when he sees Junmyeon’s scandalous expression. “Yes, it hasn’t been  _ that _ long, but we love each other and we make each other very happy. I love him, more than anything in the world. I want to spend the rest of my life with him.”

“But, uh,” Jongin smiles sheepishly, looking somewhat embarrassed. “I don’t know which food to pick? Sehun is not picky about food.”

Junmyeon barely manages to stifle a laugh at that. That is such a lie—Sehun is the pickiest eater he knows. Kyungsoo, being the good neighbor that he was, first learned how to cook in middle school because Sehun wouldn’t eat anything his mom cooked for him.  _ Why did Sehun hide this from his fiancé?  _

Junmyeon can’t tell him, though, not when the guy is sitting across from him, staring at him with a hopeful smile on his face. Junmyeon takes a deep breath.

“Sehun really likes jjigae, and you guys are getting married in the spring, so I think it would be nice. I think you should choose Soo’s kimchi spaghetti as well, it’s kind of our own special dish—it’s the first dish that Kyungsoo has ever cooked for us while we were all still in school. Sehun is a bit sentimental, so I think he would appreciate that. He’s quite picky with his food, it’d be wise to not choose things that he’s not familiar with. And since you’d be getting married in Hawaii, maybe choose some seafood dishes as well?”

Jongin looks a bit taken aback by the onslaught of information, but he recovers quickly and shoots Junmyeon a grateful smile. “Thank you for telling me, really—I would’ve been screwed without you.”

“You’re welcome,” Junmyeon replies. “And Jongin?”

“Yeah?”

“Please make him happy.”

☽

“I can’t believe you bailed on us,” Junmyeon complains into the phone. Sehun laughs at the other end of the line. “Well, Jongin told me that you guys bonded, so I would consider that a success.”

“He’s a good guy,” Junmyeon admits, albeit a little bit begrudgingly. “But Sehun, really, you’ve known this guy for a year and you decided to  _ marry  _ him? What—“

“God, please save the lecture, hyung,” Sehun groans. “I’ve already gotten enough of it already from literally everyone else. Not you too, please.”

Junmyeon sighs as he settles into his bed. “I just—I don’t want you to get hurt, Angel,” he explains gently. “I care about you and I want to make sure that you know what you’re doing.”

“I love him, hyung,” Sehun replies quietly. “He treats me so well. He is so kind and thoughtful, and he makes me so happy.”

Junmyeon’s heart ache. There’s a question on the tip of his tongue that he’s itching to ask, but he couldn’t— _ shouldn’t _ —do that. Especially now. So he swallows it back down and decides to talk about something else instead.

“I was disappointed, though,” Junmyeon pouts. Sehun couldn’t see him, but Junmyeon would bet that Sehun could hear it in his voice. “I thought that we were finally going to spend some time together, Sehun-ssi.”

“Ah, yeah, I’ve been busy with work lately,” Sehun sighs into the phone, and Junmyeon could hear Vivi barking in the background. “A group is going on tour so my team has been working overtime to choreograph the whole thing. Jongin comes in to help too, once in a while.”

Junmyeon rolls his eyes. _Of course_ _he does_. That man is so unbelievably nice that even Junmyeon with all the pettiness he could muster could not bring himself to hate him. He is a little bit clueless, though. He seemed surprised that Sehun doesn’t really like fish, or the fact that Sehun is allergic to wheat. When they said their goodbyes, Jongin looked like he was lost in thought.

“But speaking of,” Sehun says, and there’s a hint of hesitation in his voice. “You’re free on Thursdays, right?”

“Depends on why you’re asking,” Junmyeon replies drily. 

“Well, Jongin is really adamant about us having a first dance at the reception,” Sehun explains. “And I’ve never really done that—but I figured you have—“

“—and you want me to teach you,” Junmyeon concludes solemnly. “You know I’m not the best dancer, though.”

“Just teach me the steps, and I’ll take it from there. Please?” he adds, when Junmyeon didn’t say anything.

Truth is, Junmyeon has been trying to get his feelings under control. It’s probably not a good idea to teach the object of his affection how to slow dance, for his  _ wedding _ nonetheless. But again, Junmyeon has never been too good at telling Sehun  _ no _ and this time it’s no exception.

“Just text me the damn address,” he mutters into the phone. He couldn’t help but smile when he hears Sehun’s triumphant cheer from his phone’s speaker.

☽

The following Thursday, Junmyeon finds himself in the practice room of the country’s leading entertainment company. They used to dream of this when they were little, of being idols from this company, but somewhere along the way Junmyeon fell in love with musical theater, and Sehun found choreographing more appealing than all of that idol stuff. He’s not too keen on being in the public eye, anyway.

“Hello, earth to Junmyeon,” Sehun calls from across the room. He smiles at Junmyeon’s astonished expression. “It is quite impressive, huh?”

“Yeah,” Junmyeon replies. “This is much nicer than my old practice room at NYU.”

“I’m glad,” Sehun says, looking far too smug for Junmyeon’s liking. “Now, please pick your jaw up from the floor and teach me how to dance.”

Junmyeon jabs Sehun’s side harshly with his finger, making the younger man groan dramatically, before he stores his belongings at the couch in the corner and takes off his jacket.

“What song did you guys choose?” Jumyeon asks as he stretches. 

Sehun plugs in his phone to the room’s sound system. A soft piano ballad starts playing through the speakers, followed by a man’s gentle vocals filling the room with beautiful melodies.

“Chanyeol found this guy on the open mic nights, he usually performs with his boyfriend on the piano. I think his name is Jongdae?” Sehun explains. “But he convinced him to record a song that he had written for Kyungsoo in college.”

“I didn’t remember him making these kinds of songs,” Junmyeon comments. “The ones he e-mailed to me were his thirsty musings about Kyungsoo’s ass.”

Sehun laughs. “Yeah, I think he polished this one recently with Jongdae and his boyfriend—Minseok? I think that’s what his name is—but anyway, he gave it to me last week as an early wedding present and I can’t get over how beautiful this is. The song is called  _ My Dear _ .”

The song is beautiful and the lyrics are so grossly romantic (a Chanyeol trademark), and it makes Junmyeon yearn for a relationship that he has never experienced—and for the man standing in front of him. Sehun notices Junmyeon staring at him and he grins. “Do I look  _ that _ good today, hyung? Why are you staring?”

“Your shirt is inside out,” Junmyeon retorts back. Sehun looks baffled before he looks down, and he bursts into laughter. It’s far from pretty—it kind of sounds like a dying whale, to be honest, but Junmyeon loves it, loves how genuine and full of mirth it is, and call him corny but he thinks that it’s the most beautiful sound he’s ever heard.

“Fuck, have I been walking around like this for the whole day?” Sehun shakes his head. “That’s so funny, god.” He takes off his shirt and turns it inside out before wearing it again, while Junmyeon tries to avert his eyes and totally  _ not _ ogling him through the mirror and wishing that the floors would open up and swallow him whole.

“Well, come on, then” Junmyeon extends his hand when Sehun’s done, feeling exhausted already. “Let’s get this over with.”

☽

Junmyeon feels like his heart is going to leap off of his chest for about the gazillionth time this afternoon. Sehun is pressed so close to him, and Junmyeon says a silent thanks to his nightmare of a ballroom dancing professor that he’s mostly dancing with muscle memory alone, and therefore could focus all of his remaining brain cells into not blushing whenever Sehun is holding him close after he twirls him.

“You know, I think Jongin’s taller than you,” Junmyeon mutters after the nth time Sehun twirled him. “Are you sure you should be the one doing the twirling?”

Sehun snorts. “First of all,  _ I’m  _ taller than him. Second of all, my tiny bunny hyung, you can’t reach high enough to twirl me, so your point is moot.”

Junmyeon looks up to him, smiling, before he harshly tugs on Sehun’s ear. “I see that Chanyeol and Kyungsoo has been too wrapped up in their own world to discipline your sassy mouth, huh, Angel?”

Sehun groans. “Ow ow  _ ow _ , okay, fine! I’m sorry!”

Junmyeon releases Sehun’s reddening ear with a childish pout. “I’m going home.”

“What—no way!” Sehun protests, one hand still rubbing on his red ear. “Come on, you can twirl me this time, see—“

He takes Junmyeon’s hand and spins himself awkwardly, having to lean down so he can fit into Junmyeon’s wingspan, and then resting his hand on Jumyeon’s waist. “See? It’s not that hard.”

Junmyeon’s clever comeback died a tragic death in his throat, because Sehun is pressed flushed against him. Junmyeon just has to get on his tiptoes to press their lips together—and Junmyeon would give absolutely everything to be able to taste him again and—

Sehun’s phone rings, effectively cutting off the music and Sehun lets go of Junmyeon’s waist like he had been electrocuted, and Junmyeon wonders if it was just him who got lost in the moment or if Sehun—

“Hi, babe,” he hears Sehun say into the phone. “I’m in practice right now.”

Junmyeon takes out his own phone and shoots Kyungsoo a message, tuning out Sehun’s conversation with his fiance.

**to: kyungsoo**

_ let’s grab a drink _

☽

“So are you going to tell me what’s going on with you, or am I supposed to wait until you get absolutely shitfaced and pry it off of you then?”

Junmyeon avoids Kyungsoo’s sharp gaze and takes another shot of his fifth bottle of soju, waiting until the burning sensation on his throat subsides before he spurts out, “SehunandIslepttogetherlastyear.”

“ _ What? _ ” Kyungsoo’s eyes widen almost comically and Junmyeon’s drunk brain finds it absolutely  _ hysterical _ .

“Hyung,  _ fuck _ , stop laughing!” Kyungsoo snaps, poking Junmyeon’s side sharply, making the older man groan. “What did you just say?”

“Remember when I went home last Chuseok and had that big fight with my dad?” Junmyeon says, his words are thankfully only  _ slightly _ slurred. “My flight was not for another night so I needed a place to crash for the night, so I called Sehun up. I knew he was in the city because he couldn’t go with his mom to his grandparents’ because of a work thing. When I got there he was already tipsy because he had a fight with this guy that he was seeing, so we started drinking together and the next thing I knew we were making out on his couch, and then one thing led to another and—well, you can guess what happens next.”

“You both were being idiots and swore that you would never mention this again?” Kyungsoo guesses. 

“Bingo,” Junmyeon replies, pouring another shot for himself and immediately knocking it back.

“Well,  _ fuck _ ,” Kyungsoo sighs, taking another sip of his beer. He decided earlier in the night that he would at least try to be responsible for both of them tonight.

“I almost kissed him too, today,” Junmyeon laments, picking the label off of his bottle. “And I think he would’ve kissed me back—but then his fiancé called.”

They are quiet for a while, busy with their own thoughts before Kyungsoo says, “You know, we always thought that he would end up with you.”

“Huh?” Junmyeon makes a confused noise. “What are you talking about?”

“Sehun was in love with you for years, hyung,” Kyungsoo says nonchalantly, like he did not just dropped the biggest truth bomb of Junmyeon’s life. “You were his first love—didn’t you know?”

“Do I look like I know?” Junmyeon hisses, his mind racing a hundred miles per hour, feeling nauseous and hopeful and resentful all at the same time.  _ Sehun was in love with him? For how long? Did he  _ miss _ his chance? _

“Are you fucking serious?” Kyungsoo says, sounding absolutely baffled. “Hyung, he was not exactly  _ subtle _ with it. Remember when he filled up your room with balloons and candles and he baked you fucking  _ cupcakes  _ for Valentine’s Day in junior high?”

“I—yeah, but it was just—“

“A friend thing?” Kyungsoo scoffs. “God, are you actually  _ dumb _ ? Hyung, he wouldn’t even walk across the street to get jajangmyeon and used to get it delivered to his doorstep, do you think he would put in that much effort for just anyone?”

Junmyeon wants to cry. He couldn’t believe this. He spent the last year pining for his childhood best friend and feeling absolutely miserable—and Sehun had spent most of his childhood feeling the same way about him?

“Why didn’t he tell me?” Junmyeon says exasperatedly.

“I don’t know,” Kyugsoo replies. “Maybe he’s afraid that he could lose you if you didn’t feel the same way?”

Junmyeon swears up a storm before he takes a large swig of the bottle in front of him, while Kyungsoo watches him, and Junmyeon could see him putting things together out of the corner of his eyes.

"Wait, are  _ you _ in love with him?" Kyungsoo says bewilderedly. "After one night?"

"It wasn't just that night, Soo," Junmyeon sighs, putting his glass down. "I think I've known it for a while, but I don't think that I want to acknowledge it. It's  _ Sehun _ , you know? I didn't want to fuck things up."

"Because you love him," Kyungsoo says gently. "I've been there."

"So what did you do?"

"Honestly? Nothing," Kyungsoo replies sheepishly. He chuckles when he sees Junmyeon's annoyed expression. "I don't know what to tell you, hyung. I was too caught up with my stupid teenage angst to do anything about it. Thankfully Chanyeol got his shit together or we wouldn’t be married right now."

"Guess I asked the wrong friend for drinks, huh," Junmyeon grumbles under his breath, wincing when Kyungsoo punches his shoulder in response.

They were quiet after a while before Kyungsoo finally asks, "So are you going to tell him?"

"I don't know," Junmyeon says, finishing up his bottle. "Is it worth it?"

"All I know is that you would regret it if you don't," Kyungsoo replies. "I could've saved myself and Chanyeol a lot of heartache in high school and college if I had been brave enough."

Junmyeon’s mind wanders to Sehun and Jongin, how they look completely in love with each other, and yet—

"They're not ready, are they?" Junmyeon says, more of a statement than a question.

"Jongin loves Sehun but he doesn't know shit about him,” Kyungsoo says. “And Sehun's no better—he didn't even know what Jongin's favorite color is.”

"Sehun's favorite color is orange," Junmyeon supplies drunkenly. “He looks good in orange.”

“Hyung, love alone is not enough to sustain a marriage,” Kyungsoo pleads. “You should talk to him, for his own good. He listens to you.”

Junmyeon swears up a storm under his breath before dropping his head onto the table with an audible thunk. He misses Kyungsoo’s pitiful gaze as he reaches out to ruffle Junmyeon’s hair sympathetically.

“I’ll go get the bill, hyung.”

☽

Junmyeon couldn’t get Kyungsoo’s words out of his head—so he starts to avoid Sehun. Or tries to anyway. They still meet up for their dance practice session every Thursday, though it seems like they have an unspoken agreement to never ever talk about what could’ve happened that day, much like what they did after the night they slept together—and Junmyeon hates it.

Because being with Sehun is so easy, almost effortless. Sehun  _ knows _ him, inside and out, and it seems like they revert back to their old selves whenever they are together. They went for coffee after practice one week and Sehun just shot out both of their orders without even blinking. He only noticed what he did after he paid and turned to see Junmyeon’s impressed smile.

“What?” Sehun said defensively. “You’ve never gotten anything else in all the time I’ve known you.”

“And you’ve known me your whole life,” Junmyeon replied, bumping their shoulders together. He saw Sehun’s ears turning red before the younger man wraps a hand around his shoulder and leads them towards the pick-up counter.

Point is, Junmyeon has been meaning to avoid Sehun and thinks things over, but he just couldn’t stay away. Sehun is addictive to him—he reminds him of his younger self, the one who’s confident and hopeful, who still has dreams that he wants to achieve, the one who is not so fucking weary all the time because the world hasn’t fucked him over yet. Sehun reminds him of the person he used to be, and the person that he wanted to become.

It also doesn’t help that Sehun is starting to invite him out on Fridays. Sehun would drag him to restaurants that he had found online, and Junmyeon would pay, and then they would get some coffee and walk around the banks of the Han River and just  _ talk _ .

Sehun tells him everything: about his newly-adopted puppy, his job, and the kids he’s training with. And Junmyeon in turn talks about Baekhyun and Yixing and how life was in New York. It feels like they were catching up on the six years they were apart, and Junmyeon didn’t realize just how much he had missed—the two weeks he would visit Seoul annually were definitely not enough.

Junmyeon starts to notice little things the more time he spends with Sehun, things like how Sehun will drapes himself over his back while they wait in line to get their post-practice coffee, or how Sehun’s eyes will twinkle whenever he will talk about things he’s excited about. Unfortunately, two of those things are Jongin and their wedding. Junmyeon is starting to adjust to the steady dull ache in his heart whenever Sehun would bring up Jongin or the details of their wedding.

☽

“Hyung, what do you think of this one?”

Sehun is holding out a sheet of paper and Junmyeon is just about ready to bash his head into the concrete wall. They’ve been spending two whole hours in this cursed store, looking at every type of paper known to mankind. It’s yet another Sunday morning, and this time Sehun had shown up with a cup of coffee on one hand and a sandwich in another and dragged Junmyeon out of bed to pick out the paper for the damn wedding invitation. Jongin is out of the country for a photoshoot, and Junmyeon doesn’t know whether he should thank or curse him for this.

“It looks fine, Angel,” Junmyeon says, trying to look excited for the nth sheet of white paper that Sehun has pointed out today.  _ Wrong answer. _

“Hyung, you’re not even looking,” Sehun whines. He then pouts, knowing that Junmyeon will cave in and give him the response he’s looking for—and Junmyeon hates that he’s absolutely right.

“What’s this one called?” Junmyeon asks, walking towards Sehun and the store employee who’s looking at them amusedly.

“Linen finish,” Sehun answers. “I think it looks really cool and elegant, like we tore it out of a book of something. I really like it.”

Junmyeon hums. It  _ does  _ look pretty cool, and it’s the prettiest one they’ve seen so far, so he nods in agreement. “Let’s get this one, then.”

“We’ll take this one,” Sehun says with a bright smile to the store employee—Seulgi, her name tag reads. She smiles back at him and nods before ringing up the cash register. Sehun sorts out the details and pays, and they were just about to leave when they hear Seulgi says, “Um, I just want to wish you guys good luck for the big day. We’ve got a lot of couples coming in, but you guys are by far the cutest one I’ve seen.”

Junmyeon freezes, feeling heat rushing to his face and he can  _ feel _ his cheeks and ears reddening at an alarming speed. He’s just about to correct her when he feels Sehun’s arms snaking around his shoulder and pulling him close (and, if Junmyeon doesn’t know any better, possessively).

“Thank you,” Sehun says with a wide grin. “Have a good day, Seulgi-ssi.”

He steers Junmyeon out of the store and once they’re out of the building and Junmyeon has recovered a fraction of his sanity, he punches Sehun shoulder, not enough for it to bruise, but enough to make him wince.

“What the fuck was that,” Junmyeon hisses.

Sehun doesn’t even have the decency to look slightly apologetic for his actions, and laugh in his face instead. “You’re overreacting, hyung. Do you really want to embarrass her by correcting her? She seems like such a nice girl, and let’s be honest, she’s probably not being paid that well. I don’t want to unnecessarily burden her, hyung.

“Now, come on,” Sehun says, taking Junmyeon’s hand and drags him across the street. “Let’s go get something to eat. I’m starving.”

Oh Sehun is going to be the death of him.

☽

They ended up spending the whole day together, walking around and window shopping, and Junmyeon can honestly say that he has not felt this happy in a long time. He does not want the day to end, so when Sehun asked him to have dinner at his apartment, Junmyeon immediately said yes. Sehun ordered pizza over the phone as they walked, visibly cringing when he ordered Hawaiian pizza for Junmyeon, which made the older one laugh at his grossed out expression.

They’re sprawled out on the carpet of Sehun’s living room now, full from the two boxes of pizza that Sehun had ordered, watching some trash romance drama on Sehun’s flatscreen TV. Sehun is lying down on his side facing the TV with his head on Junmyeon’s lap, the older man gently stroking his hair with his fingers.

“Hyung, you’re gonna make me fall asleep,” Sehun mumbles sleepily. Junmyeon chuckles fondly. Sehun looks  _ so  _ cute like this.

“Sleep, then, Angel. I can see myself out,” Junmyeon replies, continuing his ministrations on Sehun’s hair.

“Are you not going to stay over?” Sehun asks. “It’s getting pretty late.”

“It’s only 10 pm, grandpa,” Junmyeon teases. “I have to teach a class tomorrow.”

“But you’re comfortable,” Sehun whines, hugging Junmyeon’s leg to emphasize his point. The latter shakes his head in amusement.

“Tough luck, kiddo.”

They were quiet for a while, watching the heroine yet again got fooled by the mean antagonist lady on screen. The silence between them is comfortable, it feels almost...domestic. Junmyeon thinks about his past relationships, and he can’t recall the last time he felt this tranquil with another person. His past relationships usually crash and burn before it gets even remotely close to this.

“Hey, hyung,” Sehun calls, effectively pulling Junmyeon out of his reverie. “Thanks for accompanying me today. I know it’s boring to do all of this wedding stuff, so I really appreciate that you were there for me today.”

“No need to thank me, Angel,” Junmyeon replies. “I’m always here for you, you know that.”

“Yeah,” Sehun says, sighing heavily. “It was really easy doing it with you too.”

“What do you mean?” Junmyeon asks. He steals a glance at Sehun’s face, and the younger man looks somewhat wistful, eyes still trained at the screen.

“Planning out a wedding is stressful,” Sehun begins. “You have all this  _ shit  _ to pick out—flowers, food, papers, music—and Jongin—he’s never here, and it’s stressing me out. And even when he  _ is  _ here, our preferences never match and we keep having these petty fights over something dumb and it’s just so—so  _ frustrating _ !”

Junmyeon hears a sniffle, and he instantly reaches for the tissue that they put on the couch while they were eating earlier. He grabs a couple of sheets and he gently wipes the tears on Sehun’s face, but he stays silent, not wanting to make the situation worse.

“I love him, I do, but it’s just hard sometimes, you know? I feel like our preferences clash a lot of the time and we have to compromise on every single thing and it’s just—it’s not easy. It’s not like it is between you and me.”

And there it is.

Junmyeon has spent the last few months trying not to think about that, trying not to compare himself to Jongin or their relationship with Sehun. Because, at the end of the day, Junmyeon is just Sehun’s best friend and Jongin is the man that Sehun is going to marry. Not him.

But Junmyeon is in love with him. Junmyeon loves him so much that it hurts him to see Sehun like this. And Junmyeon knows that being honest with Sehun about his feelings, especially now, is going to make him lose his best friend—but if he marries Jongin he would still lose him anyway.

He’s fucked either way. But at least—at least he would know.

Junmyeon retracts his hand and shakily takes a deep breath, Kyungsoo’s words echoing in his head.

_ All I know is that you would regret it if you don’t. _

“Sehun, I don’t think you should marry him.”

Sehun sniffles. “What?”

“I—I don’t think you should marry Jongin.”

“Hyung, what are you talking about?” Sehun asks, confusion evident in his voice. He sits up, and Junmyeon immediately misses his warmth. Junmyeon avoids his gaze, knows that he will lose his conviction if he sees Sehun’s face. 

“He’s not right for you,” Junmyeon says. “You said it yourself—being with him is hard and—”

“That’s not what I meant,” Sehun replies with frustration. “I just mean that we need to work things out.”

“Shouldn’t it be easy, though?” Junmyeon reasons. “Shouldn’t it be effortless and easy and comfortable? Sehun, you’re going to spend the rest of your life with him—”

“Hyung, I love him!” Sehun snaps, making Junmyeon flinch. “Why are you trying to talk me out of this?”

“Because he doesn’t know you, okay?” Junmyeon yells back. “He doesn’t know your favorite food. He doesn’t know that your favorite color is orange. He doesn’t know that you don’t like fish or that you don’t like to sleep in the dark or—”

“Why does that matter?” Sehun scoffs. “Why does any of it matter?”

“Because he doesn’t know you like I do!” Junmyeon shouts. He turns to look at Sehun, choking back a sob. “He doesn’t know all these things that make you who you are—but I do!”

“Why do you have to pick him over me, Sehunnie?”

Sehun looks at him, stunned. Junmyeon can feel the tears slowly escaping his eyes, and he harshly rubs them away. They look at each other for a moment before Sehun closes his eyes, pulling his legs into his chest and hugs his knees. He looks small all of a sudden and it makes Jumyeon’s heart ache.

“You should leave,” Sehun whispers. “I don’t want to see you, please leave.”

“Sehunnie—”

“Please, Junmyeon.”

Junmyeon gathers his things and heads towards the door, glancing one last time to the lone figure in the living room whose body is shaking with quiet sobs before he leaves.

☽

It’s been two weeks since Junmyeon had last seen him on that disastrous day. He broke down once he reached his apartment and then proceeded to take the week off, dodging every call and texts from his friends. It took a very persistent Kyungsoo threatening to break down his bedroom door for him to crawl out and open the door.

“You look like shit,” was the first word that came out of Kyungsoo’s mouth. He drags Junmyeon to the bathroom, yelling at him to take a shower while he made lunch for the both of them. Junmyeon spent a good hour moping under the stream of hot water before he emerged to the kitchen.

Kyungsoo had pushed a plate of kimchi fried rice in front of him and said, “Talk.”

So Junmyeon told him everything. By the end of it, Kyungsoo took off his glasses and grabbed himself and Junmyeon a can of beer each, and finished his in one go.

“You two are a fucking mess,” he commented.

“Is Chanyeol with him?” Junmyeon asked timidly. He wanted to reach out to Sehun, but he knew that he was the last person that Sehun had wanted to hear from.

“Yeah. From what I know he’s not in a better shape than you are,” Kyungsoo answers.

“Do you think I hurt him?” Junmyeon asked weakly. “Do you think he hates me now?”

“I don’t know about the first one, but you know he could never hate you, hyung,” Kyungsoo replies patiently.

“Let him cool down for a while. He’ll reach out to you when he’s ready.”

And now, Junmyeon is seated on the corner of the coffee shop, sipping on his green tea latte and staring at the door, waiting for Sehun to arrive. Sehun had texted him at 4 am, asking if Junmyeon would meet him at their favorite coffee shop and Junmyeon had immediately agreed and sent a text back once he had woken up.

Sehun is late, which is unusual for him. Junmyeon is usually the one who has a problem with being punctual, so this is not a good sign.

Junmyeon looks outside the window to distract himself from overthinking. It’s nearing the end of the year, and it’s cold in the way that Junmyeon knows it’s going to snow soon. The streets outside look pretty and well lit with Christmas decorations. Christmas is Sehun’s favorite holidays, and he had mentioned a while ago that he’s going to decorate his own Christmas tree this year, and Junmyeon had promised to get him some ornaments for his tree. Sehun had smiled at him then, small yet incredibly fond—and Junmyeon wonders whether he would ever get to see it again.

He’s almost too lost in his own thought to hear the door open, but when he looks up, he sees Sehun, standing on the doorway, unwrapping his scarf. He looks beautiful in a navy coat and light-wash denim, with a black baseball cap perched low on top of his head, hiding half his face. He glances around the room and finds Junmyeon, giving him a small smile before he goes to the counter and orders his drink. Thankfully, it’s past the afternoon rush hour, so the coffee shop is not crowded. Junmyeon tries to steady his heartbeat as Sehun walks towards him.

“Hi,” Sehun greets with a small smile.

“Hi, Sehunnie,” Junmyeon greets back. Sehun takes the seat opposite him and takes a sip of his drink before he starts talking.

“I called off the wedding,” Sehun says, cutting straight to the point, his voice giving nothing away. “You were right, we don’t know each other enough to get married.”

“Sehunnie—“

“Please just let me finish,” Sehun cuts him off immediately. “I love Jongin, I really do. But we were just not right for each other. He was running away from something and so was I. It was doomed to fail from the start. I guess we were both too stubborn to see it.”

Sehun takes another sip of his drink before he continues. “I was in love with you, hyung. I didn’t even remember when it started, but for as long as I can remember, I’ve been in love with you. But then you moved to New York and I—

“I didn’t think you would ever come back to Seoul, hyung.” Sehun says. “You’ve always hated it here and New York was your dream—I never even dared to think about being with you. You were just so—out of reach, for me. I never think that you would actually—“

“Love you back?” 

Sehun looks taken aback, pausing before he nods. “Yeah.”

“Can I apologize now?” Junmyeon asks timidly. Sehun smiles at that, as warm and fond as Junmyeon remembers.

“I’ve already forgiven you. Besides, it was not like you were wrong—”

“Maybe,” Junmyeon interjects. “But I still could have done it better, though.”

“It’s alright, hyung, really,” Sehun reassures him. “I’m okay.”

They smile at each other awkwardly, but at least the tension has visibly lessened. Junmyeon had expected worse, really, more fighting and screaming, but Sehun doesn’t seem to hate him, so Junmyeon counts that as a win in his book. But then Sehun sets his drink on the table and takes off its cupsleeve and starts to fidget with it.

“You still have something to say, don’t you?” Junmyeon asks gently. Sehun looks up, looking like a deer caught in the headlights.

“I—yeah,” Sehun replies nervously.

“Well?”

“I think we should stop seeing each other for a while,” Sehun says. “I need to think about things before I can—“ he takes a deep breath. “You’re my best friend, hyung. You were my first love, too. I don’t want to lose you.”

“Angel,” Junmyeon sighs, taking Sehun’s trembling hands and squeezing it thrice, relieved when the other doesn’t pull away. “Whatever your decision might be, Sehun-ah, I would respect it.”

“You’ll always have me. I promise.”

☽


	2. Chapter 2

The cherry blossoms are in full bloom again. Junmyeon has always loved cherry blossoms the most, he loves its soft pink color and how it only blooms a few times a year, making the occasion precious and special. Growing up, he would always drag Sehun to their local festival and watch the flowers bloom, excitedly taking pictures while he talks Sehun’s ear off about any new musicals he had discovered.

Sehun is in Tokyo now, the group he’s in charge with has been promoting in Japan for about five months now. He likes it there, his surrounding is foreign but there’s still a sense of familiarity there. It’s comfortable, and he can walk around the city without being reminded of Junmyeon or Jongin.

He still feels some guilt over how things had ended with his ex-fiancé. Jongin had cried that day, and so did he, but Jongin understood. Jongin had forgiven him, accepting Sehun’s apologies with a kiss before he walked out of Sehun’s apartment and out of his life.

Sehun misses Junmyeon terribly, though. Sehun didn’t tell him that he was going to Tokyo until he had arrived at the Narita Airport, afraid that he would not go if he had seen him before he left. But he knows that Junmyeon understands. He wished him good luck through text, followed by _i miss you_. Sehun still hasn’t replied.

It’s a Thursday, and the weather is nice, so Sehun decides to take Vivi on a walk. He’s glad that he decided to bring his puppy, because even though he’s a lazy bum, Vivi seems to know when Sehun is feeling down and would come over and demand to be petted.

He brings Vivi to a small park not too far from the apartment and takes off his leash, letting him run around and tire himself out before they get back. The park is not too crowded since it’s still quite early in the day, so Sehun plops down on the grass and lie down with his eyes closed, soaking up the sunlight.

He doesn’t know how much time has passed before he hears Vivi barks excitedly, and he hears a familiar laugh that makes him sit up and turn, looking for the source of the voice, and he gasps.

Junmyeon is crouching down, laughing and his hands are petting Vivi gently, while the dog licks his face excitedly. Junmyeon manages to calm Vivi down and then he looks around and he meets Sehun’s gaze. His wide smile drops, morphing into something smaller, fonder. He scoops Vivi into his arms and he walks towards Sehun.

Sehun swears inwardly. _Fuck_ , he’s no ready. Did he even brush his hair this morning? Did he put on BB cream? Have he brushed his teeth—

“Hi, Sehunnie.”

“Hyung,” Sehun says breathlessly. “I—how—”

“Oh, I’m in town for a conference,” Junmyeon says. “My hotel is nearby and the weather’s nice, so I figured I’d go for a walk. Didn’t expect that I’d see you here, though.”

“Yeah,” Sehun replies. “Me too.”

They look at each other for a moment before Vivi starts fussing in Junmyeon’s arms and he puts him down gently on the ground. Sehun immediately hooks his leash back onto his collar, he takes a deep breath, willing himself to be brave.

“Hyung, do you want to get coffee?”

☽

They walk to the coffee shop in silence, and Sehun has too many things on his mind that he doesn’t even know how to start. But it wasn’t uncomfortable. Sehun would catch Junmyeon glancing at him sometimes, and every time he does Jumyeon would just smile shyly at him. He doesn’t pull away when their fingers brush either.

They reach the coffee shop after ten minutes, and Junmyeon volunteers to get their coffee while Sehun stays outside with Vivi.

“Iced americano, right?” Junmyeon asks. “With an obscene amount of sugar?”

Sehun laughs. “Yes, hyung.”

They find another park after they got their coffee, leaving Vivi to wander around while they sit on the bench. Junmyeon looks around, seemingly in awe by the cherry blossoms, and he looks so beautiful like this. Sehun really, really wants to kiss him.

“Sehun,” Junmyeon says all of a sudden, making Sehun jump. Junmyeon chuckles, but his eyes are still trained to the tree above them. “I wasn’t expecting to meet you here, to be honest. I was hoping to, but I know that you asked for space and I want to respect that.”

He turns to look at Sehun, smiling gently, and Sehun’s breath gets caught in his throat.

“I know that we don’t have the best track record of being honest with each other—at least not about this,” Junmyeon continues. “And I don't want to leave with any more regrets than I already have.”

He takes a deep breath. Sehun holds his.

“I still love you, Oh Sehun. My feelings still haven’t changed, and I don't want it to. I want to be with you, Sehunnie, for the rest of my life, if you’d allow me to.”

And Sehun looks at him and he sees the sincerity in Junmyeon’s eyes, sees how much love that Junmyeon has for him, sees the boy he grew up with, the one he first fell in love with when he was fourteen, and the man who sits beside him now, the man that he loves with all his heart.

Sehun kisses him.

The relief that he feels once their lips touch—Sehun feels like the weight that he’s been carrying around since he was fourteen just—disappeared, making him feel as light as a feather, and the only thing that tethers him to the earth is Junmyeon. Junmyeon cups his face gently, carefully, like Sehun is something precious, and he kisses him sweetly, slowly, love evident with every touch of his lips.

When they pull apart, both of them are misty-eyed, and Junmyeon hides himself in the crook of Sehun's shoulder and he just starts laughing—relieved. Sehun chuckles along with him, leaning down to press a kiss onto Junmyeon’s blushing cheek.

“The rest of our lives sounds pretty good, hyung,” Sehun says, wrapping his arms around Junmyeon, holding him tight. Sehun is never going to let him go again, not this time.

“I love you too.”

★

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dear prompter,  
> i hope that this does not disappoint. thank you for submitting it! i have a lot of fun writing this. i also would like to thank the mods for their hard work into making this ficfest possible, and for being kind and accommodating when i was not meeting my deadlines :)
> 
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/warmswinter) | [cc](https://curiouscat.qa/warmswinter)


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